Thursday, October 11, 2007

Not Me

I am not the girl who does these things
I’m not the one you see
This crazy, horrible nonsense
Has not been done by me
I don’t throw up the things I eat
I never skip a meal
I’m not someone who hurts herself
And I would never steal
I don’t have any secrets
I’ve no need to tell a lie
I’ve never attempted suicide
I’ve no reason to want to die
I’ve never been in the hospital
Or an ambulance or cop car
I’ve never lived in a group home
Nowhere near, or far
I’ve never been in restraints
I’ve never been sent away
Never been in treatment
Or had meds brought on a tray
I don’t need to take pills
I am already sane
I don’t need to go to therapy
I’ve got nothing to gain
I sleep soundly every night
No trouble there, it seems
I’ve never had a flashback
I never have bad dreams
I've never been abused
Physically or sexually
Nor emotional or mental
It's never happened to me
I’ve never dissociated
Never had a panic attack
I’m not this person people think I am
So please, just take a step back
This awful girl you're speaking of
This terrible person you see
You must be mistaking with someone else
Because, it's just not me


Blogger Aqua said...

Hi Kathrynn,
I happened across your blog this morning and Wow! I read your profile...and your love of everything sound so much like me

...unfortunately, so does your illness. I am sorry you are in so much pain. I don't know how to help except to say you are not out there by yourself.

I know for me weekly therapy has been a godsend. It helps that I have a great psychiatrist. Medication has not helped me, but I have made huge changes in my life to try to help and sometimes they do.

None of us needs to go through this alone. By writing in my blog I have found there is a huge community of supporters online. I am going to add you to my blogroll and I will pop in again to say hi.

I know the struggle is hard, sometimes seemingly impossible, but please keep hanging on and trying.

Thinking of you,
p.s. You are so brave to write under your name. I hope one day I can be so brave.

7/26/2009 12:04 p.m.  

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